Advent Calendar – 23 December

When you see or hear about my husband looking after our daughter, picking her up from nursery, and taking her to the playground—and even when you see or hear about him making dinner or cleaning her bedroom—I Do Not want to hear a single comment about him “helping” me by “babysitting.” Don’t do it!

Instead, the vocabulary you need is: being a dad!

This is what dads (should) do. If two adults are bringing up a child/children, they are in it together as partners and are both equally responsible for the wellbeing of those little ones and the running of the household. Don’t let the situation of one being male fool you into thinking differently!

Dads do not babysit. (Unless the neighbour’s kids join the setup 😆)

So, yes, both partners should know how much milk to put in the baby’s bottle, where the kids’ shoes are, and how long/when the toddler needs to nap. If you don’t, it’s time to step up and figure it out! (How can you seriously not know about naps?! Don’t you even notice when your child suddenly disappears for an hour each afternoon?!)

If your partner has gone out to work, relax, or get stuff done —do not bother her with questions or ask her to “tell you what to do.” Figure it out yourself.

And, if you see me or any other mothers out and about without children, do not ask where the kids are—they are probably with their father! And Do Not tell us how lucky we are that our partners help or babysit… Just No. Remember: They’re just being dads!

This applies at Christmas and other holidays too! Fathers should not be surprised when the kids open the presents because they had no part in choosing, buying, or wrapping gifts! The same goes for the dinner, the guests, the house cleaning, decorating—you name it. At Christmas and all year round, let’s recognise dads who are being good dads and sharing the load as full and active partners. I love seeing and enjoying this harmony in family life! But sadly, we still need to challenge some people’s outdated thinking on the topic.

So, let’s share the message far and wide, since some people are still stuck in their gender-stereotypical thinking from last century. I’ve AI-created some images for us to use (you can download the pictures from above by clicking here or here) — Let’s flood social media with #DadsDontBabysit.

And feel free to share your own stories and examples in the comments!